‘Hilariously bad dates are rampant in Vancouver’—and Tinder Tales proves it

Swipe right! Performers share their tales from the world of online dating at the Fox Cabaret Aug. 4.

As any jaded single urbanite will be the first to tell you, it’s a jungle out there. In fact, a number of people will take the stage at the Fox Cabaret (2321 Main St.) Aug. 4 to tell us just that in the latest instalment of Tinder Tales.

We talked to organizer Suzy Rawsome about the event, and how she finds people who want to share their stories of dates gone horribly awry in this modern age of hookups.

Q: Is this the first one of these that you’ve done?

A: This is the 14th Tinder Tales we’ve done in BC. We started out at the Emerald last June, and have been at the Fox since February of this year. Every show thus far has sold out completely, with us often turning away 100 or more people at the door. While I can’t take credit for the show idea – the concept originated in Toronto with my friend and producer Adelaide LaFontane – the response has been absolutely amazing to witness.

Q: What was the initial inspiration?

A: My girlfriend Monica Hamburg moved out to Toronto a couple of years ago and began posting about this Tinder Tales show she had been regularly performing on. I thought to myself, wow, what a great idea for a show. I had so many of my own online nightmare dates from my early twenties on Plenty Of Fish that I would have loved to share had I lived in Toronto, so I thought I would contact Adelaide to see if she would mind me propagating the show to Vancouver. She was delighted to expand the showings. I thought I would do just one or two shows, but it turns out that hilariously bad dates are rampant in Vancouver, and we now do shows monthly in Vancouver, and quarterly on Vancouver Island.

Q: Have you heard/vetted these stories? Are there any criteria?

A: All the stories are submitted to us by email (tindertalesvancouver@gmail.com) or through the website (tindertales.ca). We usually get a couple dozen entries and I choose the best or most interesting stories from the stack. I also try to make a point to represent as many communities (LGBTQ, etc) as possible when booking, but that is secondary to story itself. I am usually looking for something really unique, funny and will get the crowd going.

Q: How did you find the performers—did you just ask friends if they had any weird/wild stories?

A: I put a casting call out in various places on Facebook usually. I am pretty tapped into the performing arts community so usually have no problem finding people who want to do the show. I also personally ask people who I think would be a good fit for the show. You’d be amazed how many people just simply do NOT online date anymore, especially those my age, in the 30-40 year range. So I do have to hunt a bit sometimes.

Patrick Maliha hosts Tinder Tales Aug. 4 a the Fox Cabaret.

Q: What is the best way to get out of a bad Tinder date?

A: For myself? I would just leave a bad date. No shame at all. It would have to be pretty bad for me to just walk out or come up with an excuse to go, but I have no problem taking off if the conversation is painful, lacking or boring. I generally go for more outgoing people who can keep up with me, so I don’t like to waste my time in awkward situations with under-socialized people. I think women are conditioned to put up with a lot, and I just don’t buy into polite society crap. I had a guy invite me to an internet cafe and the whole time he showed me his World of Warcraft characters, updated his Facebook, and then sent me to grab coffee. When I came back I dropped the coffee off and just left with my own (that he bought).

Q: Is everyone on Tinder?

A: I actually only went on Tinder for a couple of weeks about two years ago, and it was overwhelming. I am pretty sure guys swipe right on everyone. Too many messages to keep up with, too many people in my inner circle telling me they saw me on Tinder, and the one person I met up with was borderline sexual predator. I took him to a comedy show and he talked the entire time, then afterwards he tried to drag me into an alley next to the bar to make out. It was in Kitsilano so it was kind of a nice alley, but still.


Tickets are $12 in advance here.

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